February 4, 2012
Posted In: Review


My husband has been buzzing in my ear for the last few weeks that he wanted to see this.

Here’s the synopsis:

Three high school students make an incredible discovery, leading to their developing uncanny powers beyond their understanding. As they learn to control their abilities and use them to their advantage, their lives start to spin out of control, and their darker sides begin to take over.

I’ll do my best to leave out any major spoilers, but I almost think revealing the ending would be justifiable if it prevented even one person from spending money to go see this.

(I tend to exaggerate, but let’s just say that it’s never a good sign when you find yourself wanting the hero to fail and you haven’t even eaten past the butter drenched, top layer of popcorn.)  And to be fair, my husband did say he liked it. It’s not bad enough to merit a one star review, but I can’t get over how bored I felt while watching it.

The teaser you’ve just read is about all that you get plot-wise. I think the director was trying to do some sort of a inner conflict type character-journey-story, but it’s one of those things where if I had to write an essay about it for an English class, there’d be more B.S. than toner.

Walking out of the theater I was in a stupor, sort of like when I walked out of “Suckerpunch”. Except quality wise, Chronicle felt  like an amateur film festival project whereas Suckerpunch at least had visual appeal to make up for its plot deficiencies.

I turned to my husband and asked, “What was the point of watching that?” He has yet to provide me with any form of detailed answer regarding plot, characterization, graphics, or audio track to justify why he likes it. His reluctance to defend his opinion is something I don’t mind publicly calling “odd”.  Usually when he knows he’s right about something, he’ll be incredibly stubborn or insistent on proving his point.

And now, a bit of sarcasm: 

Three high school students make an incredible discovery,

‘Incredible’? More like low-budget. Oooh, a dark scary hole in the ground. And everything is being shot in first person POV so there’s more screen shots of the wall and ceiling than anything super-cool.

For the record: I think films shot through the first person POV are obnoxious. It’s like the director is just looking for an easy excuse to use cheap film and lousy camera angles. 

By the time the director got done setting up the back story for the hero’s character journey, I was  hoping the discovery would be a bunch of aliens that would kill them instantly. When the screen went dark, I wouldn’t have felt cheated if that had been the end of the movie.

leading to their developing uncanny powers beyond their understanding.

The most uncanny thing about this was why it never occurred to them to seek a medical review after the incident, or why they waited three weeks to return to the site of the “artifact” after they discovered they could do awesome things like levitate Legos.  Well, what do you know, the hole in the ground caved in. Guess that’s the end of that adventure.

As they learn to control their abilities and use them to their advantage,

Yes, telekinetically powering on a leaf blower to flip up girls’ skirts, and showing off in the school talent show, is exactly the sort of thing extra-terrestrial magic powers should be used for.  I did laugh a few times, but this wasn’t supposed to be a comedy.

their lives start to spin out of control, and their darker sides begin to take over.

In all fairness, only one of the characters had their life spin out of control, and that same character was the only one to have his dark side take over. If anyone can explain what drove the MC to go all Meyer Wolfsheim without a transition phase, I’d love to hear your interpretation.

Until then, I’m calling it weak script writing, and if I ever meet the producer, I’m taking his Phoenix University degree and beating him over the head with it.


  1. vic caswell

    ohMAN! i'm really looking forward to this one! and now to hear such negativity. 🙁
    too bad.

  2. Sarah Ahiers

    i didn't think we'd find time to see this in theaters, but i'll still probably watch it on blue ray in a couple of months. I actually really loved sucker punch, so we may have different tastes in movies

  3. No One

    The one incredible thing about the movie is the vague synopsis. I almost never go to movies, and this one definitely wasn't on my list, because the description is so weak. I guess the way I look at is that these people (director, screenwriter, etc.) are doing what they love to do, and they'll get better if they keep with it!

  4. Connie Keller

    I'm guessing that the only good to come out of this film is that you wrote a clever review and it's given your blog readers a smile/laugh for the day. Thanks!

  5. Botanist

    Don't you just hate it when that happens?

    I would have stopped at the "teaser". It was so vague it didn't entice me one little bit. I think there's a lesson there for aspiring novelists when it comes to query letters 🙂

  6. Jackie

    Well, you know I love superpower stuff so I probably will take a look. Then, I'll end up telling you that you were right… 🙂

  7. Matthew MacNish

    I would have never thought it possible a movie about telekinesis could be dull, but you've convinced me.

  8. Lydia Kang

    Thank you. Now I know not to spend my money on this!

  9. Brinda

    I haven't heard of this movie, so I guess I didn't miss anything. 🙂

  10. Golden Eagle

    I've never heard of this movie, but I'm definitely not going to see it now.

    Thanks for the review.

  11. Roland D. Yeomans

    My co-workers have wanted to see this movie so bad that I became curious and saw the trailer. I saw in a flash the whole cliched story to its predictable end. Thanks for letting me know I was right.

    Being a kid at heart, I want to see the Disney/Pixar produced JOHN CARTER, written a 100 years before AVATAR by Edgar Rice Burroughs of TARZAN fame. You have a new follower : me. Roland

Who is Kimberlee Turley?

Kimberlee Turley grew up in California where she earned a degree in Fashion Design from FIDM in 2005. Soon after, she married her husband, who was neither Mr. Darcy nor Edward Cullen, but he’d read her atrocious first novel and said it was “good” with a straight face.

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